Good-bye is such sweet sorrow... you can't have your cake and eat it too.

Bittersweet.

When I looked up it's meaning this is what I found:

bittersweet
1. when something is good but there is a bad part about it
2. a mixture of two opposing feelings.  One is good and the other, which is bad may be pleasurable but cause pain or discomfort at the same time.
3. A love-hate type situation, having equal parts that are good and bad.

Today was what I would call a bittersweet day.  It was a day to say good-bye; and yet~ it was also a day to say hello to something new and exciting.

More specifically, today I said good-bye to some awesome people that I have loved working with over the past seven months.  It is not that I won't ever see them again, but in my heart I know it will not be the same as seeing them everyday when I go into work.  It is amazing how quickly people can form friendships when they share a similar passion for the people they are serving, even when they have distinctly different positions. 

For those of you who don't already know, I am a school secretary.

It is hardly what I consider to be a 'job,' but if you must call it that I believe it to be the best job in the whole entire world.  I am so blessed to have found something to fill my days that I love so much~

But I truly don't believe in good-byes.  I believe that whole dealeo that people cross our paths and are in our lives for as long as we need them and vice versa.  Kind of like one of my very favourite movies as a child, Pete's Dragon.  Elliot stayed for as long as Pete needed him and then, at the end, he moved on to another boy that needed him more. 

Life is funny and annoying like that. 

Whenever you are happiest; working with amazing people that are funny and smart and just awesome to be around, it becomes time to move on. 

And so it is bittersweet; as I am looking forward to the future (that I know will be full of new awesome people) I will also remember fondly those I am leaving behind.  But in reality we are only a field and a phone call away so I refuse to say good-bye.  Instead I will say "I will see you next year.." but next year seems so very far away.


I hope I can have my cake and eat it too, because that is my plan.

Sucky Mother Post

Yup.  You read right.  This post is titled correctly; no typo.  And no, I'm not drinking.  Yet.  Perhaps when I'm done airing my laundry though...

So my daughter's birthday has past; on January 9th, 2013 she turned nine.  Hard to believe and bittersweet of course-- words heard from every mothers mouth on a way-too-often basis.

So the last two birthdays Claire didn't even get a party with her darling little friends and it's entirey my fault.  I would actually like to blame Christmas (as it occurs two weeks prior to her birthday) but I expect I won't get away with that.  The stores have not too much left on the shelves for the month of January and many folk are all shopped out come this month.  It is tough to be born near Christmas.  For her seventh birthday she was so upset that it was not warm enough to have her birthday outside like her brother's (his birthday is at the end of June and there is always sunshine) so we decided to postpone it and wait for the nicer weather.  Well, March became April and April became May and May become June and that was the wettest month of the year I swear. Last  year there was just so much going on; our beloved mom and grandmother had passed away in December and the thought of having a party without her here was completely unbearable.  We are very fortunate that my sister has a wonderful large family so whenever we get together to celebrate our birthdays it is just like our own amazing party and (in my mind) that was her party the last couple of years; with her cousins and family that matter the most. 

But the last time her friends helped her blow out her candles was when that nine was upside down; which is entirely too long.  So when she chose The Lorax as her theme for her long-awaited party with her friends how could I say no?  After feeling like the sucky mom of the past couple of birthday-years-past I was not able to (without feeling guilty) ask her to choose an easier theme and so Dr. Suess' The Lorax it is! The date has finally been choosen to be February 2nd; late but not too late; close but not too close to Christmas.  It is perfect and they are (of course) predicting sunshine. 

To blog, or not to blog, that is the question..

The thing about blogging is, in order to be effective you actually need to post stuff or else what's the point?  If you post every six months or yearly (like me) you lose the interest of your readers and, if you're super unlucky like I am they have since changed their email address since your last message.  So what's the point in blogging?

Honestly, I'm not sure.  I think the point is to get those random, not-worth-writing-a-book-about thoughts-that-you-just-need-to-get-off-your-chest out there; into the random empty hole that is the internet.  Whether you have 'followers' or people who read your stuff isn't necessarily the goal.  While I'm not sure what the goal is exactly, it feels good for my fingers to be moving their 68- ish words-per-minute and typing about... nothing.

There is a lot going on in my crazy mind; things that may or may not be of interest to you but here is the place I will type them anyways... of course 'anyways' is not a word, my son reminds me regularly.  I don't understand why it is not a word.  It seems to fit into so many of my conversations better than 'anyhow' does.  So to whomever decides on what words are legitimate and which words are not (now what a fun job that would be) I would like you to reconsider yo ur decision on the word 'anyways' as it brings me great happiness~

And isn't that really the point of life; to be happy?

'Anyways', onto a more interesting blog post about my suckiness as a mother...